GHOST

I don’t even know where to start because life is too confusing. I titled this article ‘GHOST’ because firstly thats the name of featured artwork but it also captures my current approach to creating art right now.

Leaning into the Absurd

I think for a while I’ve been quite reserved with things I put out for various reasons:

• Ego — We have this perspective of ourselves we want to maintain. I care about how I see myself and I see myself a certain way.
• My culture — I come from a very respectable and “normal” background. Art and expressing yourself is not really a part of my culture.
• Myself — Its my choice whether I do or not. No one is forcing me to do anything.

We need to put it all out there but we have these things holding us back.

It may seem outlandish or absurd but it’s just the feeling. It’s how I feel about things and hopefully it comes out right but we can’t really worry about that.

Imagine It?

It starts with the imagination and nowhere else.

We have these complex emotions, feelings and thoughts that dominate our everyday existence.

Transmuting them through art is the most accessible way of getting them out there.

I dont even know what I’m talking about. I’m just talking for sake of it.

I want to sound philosophical and mindful but I’m just coming across as a confused and slightly deranged author right now.

How could I think this was a good idea?

Maybe I just need to stop thinking because that’s how I ended up on Medium at 1AM in the morning rambling.

I don’t have anything profound to say or add to the world right now but I guess even seemingly non-profound things are the opposite at times.

That’s why I put into the art because I don’t even know what to say to you.

I love my family. I love my friends. I’m not suicidal and I have to say that because just look at what I’ve said so far!

It sounds like I’m having a manic episode or something its ridiculous!

Putting It Out There

I’m imagining all sorts of things and I just want to release them like a fiery storm. If could, I would snap my fingers and destroy the universe. Complete annihilation of everything just because haha. I’m not evil or mentally ill. That’s just the feeling.

It’s weird because if you talk to me, I seem like the most normal person ever. Just really quiet at times with random spurts of energy that people seem to enjoy because it’s like “wow” you can say something.

I know everyone is like me though. They just don’t express it like what I’m doing now.

I refuse to think anyone is normal. Not even my family. Sometimes I have to remind myself that people are not just NPCs in my universe and that they have their own life.

We just need to let it out because the more people hold it in the more I need to because obviously I want to seem normal.

Tell Me the Truth

I just want to tell you how I really feel. I want to jump off a balcony and start flying upwards at supersonic speed into nothing.

The sensation of exerting your mind onto reality is amazing. I want to feel it all the time.

If I could

The ghosts chase me and frolic around me. Teasing me with their nonsensical ideas about how things could be. I try to rationalize with them but they don’t understand of course. They don’t care. They just want to have fun.

I’m gonna join them now because it’s about time. Leave the world behind and party endlessly in omni-colourful nirvana.

It was fun guys but the other side seems way more appealing. For my religious readers, that’s not a demonic wish but a very human desire to experience something new.

The art and our work will be even crazier and weirder. I wanna see how weird it can get!

I’m done now

Leaning into the absurd is the title but I want to do much more than. Jumping into the absurd with a joker smile on my face would be a more honest title. Maybe even “SKITZO” because it probably reads like a schizophrenic episode.

It’s perfect because even writing this I’m thinking about how it will be perceived. I want to say all the people that know me that I’m certainly still the same person. This has always been me you just never knew.